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A murderer, imprisoned for life, broke free after 15 years and was on the run.
He broke into a house and tied up the young couple he found in the bedroom the man to a chair on one side of the room and his wife to the bed. The helpless husband watched him get on the bed, straddle his wife and start to nuzzle her neck.
His wife started to nod her head violently at which the man got up and left the room. The husband squirmed the chair across the room to his young wife and hissed "Darling, I saw him kissing you. He can't have seen a woman in years. Please cooperate. If he wants to have sex, just go along with it and even pretend you like it. Whatever you do don't fight him or make him mad. Our lives may depend on it!"
"Darling", the wife said spitting out her gag, "I'm so relieved you feel that way. He wasn't kissing me ... he was whispering to me.
He told me he thinks you're really cute and asked if we kept the Vaseline in the bathroom".
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