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Smokers Versus Drivers

Okay drivers, your time has come. You have complained about our smoke
for years, and have quadrupled the cost of a pack of cigarettes to discourage smokers and pay for public health benefits. You have run us out of the work place, and all public and private places, and left us to stand outside in the snow during a 10 minute break! In some places, like Boulder Colorado, it is illegal to smoke on the street!

Global Warming is now a fact of life, and last winter was the warmest in U.S. history! The primary cause of global warming is automobile pollution. Lung damage caused by auto pollution is far in excess of that caused by smokers, but you have refused to face the fact. Several studies have shown that auto air pollution inside buildings is worse than it is outside!

So here is what you can expect. We will raise the price of gasoline to about $5.00 per gallon and restrict your driving to "critical needs".

Forget vacations, and shopping trips. Take the bus, or use pubic transportation. Even then, your car must be 90% non-polluting, at a cost of a few thousand dollars to meet the standard. Your mileage will be electronically monitored at every major intersection, by electronic devices. You will be fined, if you exceed your monthly mileage allotment. "Sniffers", at major intersections will monitor your pollution output, and photograph your license plate if you are over the limit.

A lot of you will be walking to work, riding a bike, or using public transportation. Horses will not be allowed, because they produce obnoxious gas! Rickshaws may provide work for the currently unemployed.

A gallon of gas produces more pollution than a carton of cigarettes. If you don't believe that, suck on your tail pipe while I chain smoke, and see who survives.

Try walking to work. It is good for your health.

A smoker.

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