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THE DRINKER'S ALPHABET

A- Alcohol: The key to surviving High School or College
B- Beer: It's what's for dinner...and breakfast and lunch
C- Class: What you're supposed to get up and go to after last night's party
D- Dancing: A favorite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic
E- Emergency: The keg is empty or there is no one over 21 in your drinking party
F- Fucked Up: Signified by leaning over a toilet puking your guts out
G- Games: Anything that involves cards, stripping and chugging beers
H- Hang-over: Reminds you of how great last night was and how much you drank
I- Idiot: What you look like after doing a lap dance on fat kid after just three beers
J- Jail: Where you'll end up after trying to use a fake ID or stagger home at 5 am
K- Kissing: What you'll do to anything that moves after 15 beers
L- Lord: Person you beg to get you out of every situation involving alcohol
M- Money: That which you no longer have due to too dollar draft night at the bar
N- Not Again!: What you scream when you wake up beside someone you don't know...again
O- Oh shit!- What you say as you're falling down the stairs
P- Pee: What you have to do every five minutes while you're drinking beer
Q- Quit: What you promise to do after spending the night in jail with Bertha the Bearded Transvestite
R- Reform: What you promise god you will do while you're puking in the toilet
S- Sex: What you did with that person you met last night while you were drunk...aww yea
T- Twenty-one: Usually the age where you reach your peak of drinking
U- Underage: Most of the drinking population in town
V- Vodka: The mother of all alcohols and the best way to make Jello
W- Worm: The part of Tequila that reminds you of the porcelain god.
X- X-Ray: How they can see into your stomach before they pump it (detox).
Y- Yourself: The one who drinks WAY TOO MUCH every weekend.
Z- Zima: Zomething Different....Zomething Fun

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