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Angry Amphibians

The following is a piece that was originally printed in a local rag-mag . I have been given leave to reprint on the authority of Mick McGrath of Fishheads Magazine. Mick assures me I will not incur/endure any legal repercussions. This piece was taken from Issue 6 of Volume 1, this ish' was printed circa 8-92, (think Pre-Clinton but it's worth a laugh). If you find it humorous send Mick money, perhaps he'll send you something shiny, or maybe a back issue or two. I've edited a bit to save space. Sorry Mick.
Go Angry Amphibians Go!
What's the nicname for the teams at Indiana's third largest campus (I.U.P.U.I.)? Well, It's the Metros! (Oddly enough, Indy's slow as they wanna go bus system used to share the name.) The Metros? Think of a nicname that could possibly strike less fear in an opponent. The Horned Frogs of Texas Christian University? Maybe until one considers the lil' known fact that an angry Horned Frog can squirt blood from it's eyes. Ya think Al Gore would be so smug if I.U. Alum. Dan Quayle could squirt blood from his eyes. We think Mr. Act-so-smart-cuz-he's-got-a-brain would treat Dan with a tad more respect. At least until Dan became woozy wit blood loss. But alas, Danny boy is not a Horned Frog. He, is a Metro! (Boo!) Anywho, incase the I.U.P.U.I. administration is taking suggestions. We offer the following Nics, at least AS intimidating as the Metros.

The Fainting Goats

The Fawning Sycophants

The Injured Reserves

The Irksome Squirrels

The Screaming Placebos

The Spit Cups

The Conjugal Visits

The Dusky Plums

The Nattering Poops

The Fighting E-I-E-I-O's

The Crimson Phlegm  

The Peptic Ulcers

The Dung Beetles

The Soddomized Pretty Boys

The Inch Long Splinters

The Satanic Candy Stripers

The Indianapolis Colts

The Penile Implants

The Evil Fornicating Sea Monkeys

The 26 yr. old Sophmores Who live with their parents

Here are a few additions that were added when this piece was printed in The General Letter Quarterly.

The Rabid Aardvarks

The Big Haired Woman

The Sirly Gerbils

The Teste Sackers

The Abusive Aunties

The Database Programmers

The Nancy Boys

The Angry Alter Boys

The Mirthless Mother-in-laws

The men who say 'Boo!'

The White River Rats

The Klueless Kluts Klan

The Angst Ridden Account Temps

The Booger fingered preschoolers

The Seminefreous Nad Tubule Buttnoids

The Fighting Indianapolis Police Department


Special thanks to Mick Mcgrath for the Angry amphib's piece. If your interested in receiving a copy Fishheads, send Mick money. 5264 E. 9th st. Indy, IN 46219. He needs Booze and Hookers!
 

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